October 31, 2014

‘The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM Role Play and the Erotic Edge’ by Tristan Taormino

Posted on 15. Aug, 2012 by in Nonfiction, Reviews

In a world increasingly dominated (pun intended) by 50 Shades of Grey and other arguably unrealistic representations of BDSM, Tristan Taormino’s The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM Role Play and the Erotic Edge is exactly what we need. This primer takes the biggest names in the kink world and binds them together (the puns here are endless) into the kind of how-to guide our community has desperately needed for a long time. Taormino has put together a collection that masters the difficult job of being everything a beginner first exploring kink could need, while also being a book that seasoned players are proud to display on their bookshelf. 

The book is broken into chapters, each tackled by an expert in that particular area like human-animal role-play, bondage, fisting, piercing, age play, tantric sex and so much more, each written by celebrated authors like Patrick Califia who explores “Butthole Bliss: The Ins and Outs of Anal Fisting” and “Enhancing Masochism: How to Expand Limits and Increase Desire” and Laura Antoniou who provides readers with a primer on “How To Train Your Sex Slave.”  The sections also include easy to follow diagrams that helpfully illustrate various concepts being presented.

The Ultimate Guide To Kink is groundbreaking in its breadth, providing readers with an intimate understanding of sensation-based SM play, while also not shying away from involved exploration of the mental and emotional aspects of kink from both the top and bottom perspectives.  Filled with personal reflections from some of the most seasoned players in our community, this book moves beyond a simple “how to” and gives readers an opportunity to step into a role/identity/scene and get an authentic taste and a chance to safely explore/fantasize.

In this collection Taormino smoothly manages the difficult task of creating a book that can speak to a wide range of audiences. The Ultimate Guide to Kink provides what I imagine is an approachable and welcoming introduction to many aspects of BDSM play that I wish I’d had available to me when I jumped into BDSM a decade ago. From Felice Shay’s chapter on “Playing with Rough Sex” to edgier and taboo role play like “Digging in the Dirt: The Lure of Taboo Role Play” by Mollena Williams the book truly has something for folks of all experience levels, from a beginner who’s curious about exploring to more experienced readers interested in being challenged by discussion of kink community/culture, edge play and consensually pushing our limits. The Ultimate Guide to Kink is a landmark collection destined to be a touchstone classic to recommend to anyone interested in BDSM exploration.

 

The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM Role Play and the Erotic Edge
By Tristan Taormino
Cleis Press
Paperback, 9781573447799, 464 pp.
March 2012

Sassafras Lowrey got hir start writing as a punk zinester in Portland, Oregon. Ze is the editor of the two time American Library Association honored & Lambda Literary Finalist Kicked Out anthology, and Leather Ever After. Hir debut novel Roving Pack (www.RovingPack.com) was honored by the American Library Association and chronicles the underground lives of gender-radical queer youth searching for identity, community, and belonging. Sassafras has contributed to numerous anthologies and publications, and ze believes storytelling is essential in the creation of social change. Ze is the 2013 winner of the Lambda Literary Foundation's Berzon Emerging Writer Award. Sassafras lives and writes in Brooklyn with hir partner, two dogs of dramatically different sizes, and two bossy cats.www.SassafrasLowrey.com

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